Ass. #45: Just a reminder I’m out of the office on Christmas Day to visit my wife’s family.

Gamble: Uh-huh…Will you be available remotely?

Ass. #45: I’ll be available anally, if that helps.

Gamble: What was that?

Ass. #45: I said I’ll be available eternally.

Gamble: Good, good…Now back to work!